“What’s the first thing you would do after the pandemic?” a student asked me through the Zoom screen on my birthday.
“I would hug everyone I could,” I told him. I’m optimistic. I’m a dad, I have to be. I don’t believe “firewalls” are meant for people. That’s pessimistic, petulant and pernicious. We’ve overcome a separation caused by a calculus of silence by creating our own interactive algorithm to change the narrative, write our own story. We’re going the distance as we realize there’s hope; a light at the end of the tunnel; and that bright beacon is our young. Dads need to lead the way.
I just turned 70. In the midst of all the protests, politics and polemics, my students have humbled me. Since my bout with cancer two years ago, I’ve focused my classes on heroes. It’s been life altering for me. Students tell me heroes are imperfect, impartial, resilient, protective and honest. Their authenticity erodes much of the fears I acquiesced to as I’ve seen our country struggle to find itself again. It will. I see it in my students. I see it in my sons.
They talk about John Lewis, AOC, Buttigieg and Stacey Adams. They mention moms, dad, uncles and aunts. I’ve walked protest lines with the young. Seen them as my children. Together we’ve accepted a ‘collective responsibility’ of being in this together and when the student asked me that question, I didn’t hesitate. There was no vitriol; lingering question of whether it was the right thing to say. It was authentic. It was real. It was as if I could reach through the Zoom screen and touch the young man as that asked me that question, as though he was my own son, and he responded without hesitation, “I’d probably do the same thing.”
In the middle of all the controversy, can we take a moment? Can we ask where we are? Can we address the fulcrum of indecision and resolve to do better, as Maya Angelou once told us, people might forget what you said, but they will never forget how you made them feel? How are you feeling now?
Since I can remember, I’ve been told the truth will set you free. What is the truth now? Here’s a thought! Why don’t we just agree to tell the truth? Can we handle it? Do we realize we can change the narrative? Control how we feel? On our side, truth can indeed change things with an opportunity to make it better. So I ask you as I asked them, who is your hero?
Is it someone alive, dead, or fictional? Share that story. We can’t deny the truth. We cannot deny how we feel or like a raisin in the sun, we’ll shrivel up and die. But we won’t. Our children won’t. America won’t.
America will survive because we are strong. We are resilient. We are a mosaic masterpiece of young and old, culturally and ethnically diverse. We are survivalist, led by the young, who Sebastian Junger talks about in his book “Tribe,” who want to belong. This is their belonging, their movement. Hand in hand, we accept the collective responsibility to affirm being right is better than winning; treating others the way we would like to be treated is better than winning; being honest, having integrity, grit and sacrifice is better than winning.
The young have the baton and will eradicate the demons trying to incinerate our democracy. Our children are carrying the baton fueled with an indignation that knows character matters; having a moral compass matters; freedom matters. Our children have become a beacon focused on equity and equality with everything to do with being human.
So yes. The first thing I would do is hug as many people as I could, careful to realize if I don’t hug tightly to democracy, it will die; fade away like a loved one. But be aware. There’s a virus more deadly than the current pandemic in America—the virus of apathy. It will kill democracy, freedom, families and America if we don’t stand against it.
I’m confident our children will stand; want to get into a little “good trouble,” and John Lewis would say, “Let them!” So we can hug again.
“If you don’t invest very much, then defeat doesn’t hurt very much and winning is not very exciting.” Dick Vermer Archie Wortham, Ph.D. Teacher & Columnist [210] 486-5231
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